Heartbreak Boy
by I Don't Want To Say Goodbye
Summary: I've always been the best friend, the shoulder to cry on, the one who comforts Austin when he's having relationship problems. Why doesn't he see that I love him more than any of those girls? Why can't he see that I'm a Heartbreak Girl as much as he's a Heartbreak Boy? Songfic of a slightly altered version of Five Seconds of Summer's "Heartbreak Girl." Oneshot that may be expanded.
1. Chapter 1

**AN: I'm currently obsessing over 5 Seconds of Summer, so I'm doing a little songfic (with a twist) for Heartbreak Girl, as that's my favorite Five Seconds of Summer song. (Listen to the Troye Sivan version, it's so good. :))**

**I picked this song because sometimes I just think we see how Austin is friend-zoned by Ally, and sometimes we don't see how bad Ally is friend-zoned by Austin.**

**I don't own Austin and Ally, or (a slightly edited version of) Heartbreak Girl. Enjoy!**

**(EDIT: I've been informed that adding the lyrics was not allowed, so I've removed them. Still listen to the song, though. It's a good song.)**

**Heartbreak Boy**

**Ally POV**

I remember the very first time Austin called me, crying about a girl who broke his heart. It's a little hazy who it was—I'm pretty sure it was Cassidy, but it might've also been Kira or Tilly—but that wasn't the important part.

The important part was that he was crying so hard I could barely make out what he was saying (maybe that's why I can't remember who the girl was—I couldn't tell whether he was saying _Cassidy broke up with me _or _Kira said it's over _or _Tilly hates me now_), and he was just so sad and despairing, and I just hated how I couldn't be as sad as him. I just… I just want Austin to see that I love him more than those girls do.

I wish I wasn't so obsessed with Austin. If he asks me to do anything, I'll do it. Like, if he asked me to jump off a bridge, I'd probably do it. Which is really unhealthy, and actually kind of scary, now that I think about what kind of power he holds over me.

If only I could tell him how I feel… But he's so caught up in everyone else that he'd never consider me anything besides a friend. A "best friend."

It almost kills me when he calls me his best friend. I used to be so happy when he'd put his arm around me and smile and call me his best friend, but now, it hurts, because I wish he'd be able to call me something that meant more than that.

It's just so frustrating, because it's like re-reading a book; you know how the characters end up, and you want to scream at them for the stupid decisions they make, but you can't because you might know the ending yet, but they don't.

Every time Austin falls for these girls, I know how it'll end; they think they're getting into a glamorous life with Austin, but when they find all these quirks (his love for pancakes, the fact that his best friend is a girl, he isn't naturally very romantic, they drop him and leave him for me to fix up.

I love all those things about him. I'd hold him all night, right up until the sun rose, and I'd be his cure. But he doesn't want me to be that. He apparently just wants us to be friends.

Sometimes, when I feel really tired and angry, I just want to scream at him, saying, _"Why are you with so many girls that make you cry? Why do you keep going back to people who hurt you, but you still only give them love? You give and give and give love, and you receive and receive and receive disinterest. When will you realize that the only person who won't hurt you is me? Because you're a part of me and hurting you would be exactly like hurting myself."_

And sometimes I think I'll go and do it, and say that to him. But when I go to say it, all that comes out is, _"You just haven't found the right girl yet. You'll find her one day, I promise. Maybe she just doesn't live in Miami. Maybe she's in New York. Maybe she's going to move here in a few years. Maybe she'll go to your college," _and what never comes out is, _"Maybe she's right next to you. Maybe she and you spent all of yesterday scribbling lyrics on a piece of paper, and all she could concentrate on was how nice your handwriting was and how good it looked next to hers. Maybe she's telling you all of this while wondering when it's her turn to be loved by you."_

I should really stop being so nice to him. Maybe if I start ignoring him, he'll like me. Maybe that's how all those other girls got him to like them.

Sometimes, I just wish I had the ability to not pick up the phone when he calls. Why do I bother? I know what he's going to say. He cries about girls who don't love him the way _he _loves _them, _the way _I _love _him. _For once, it would be nice if he called and told me he loved me back, and asked if I would be his girlfriend. But that's a useless wish. Every time he calls, he cries about girls and puts more layers around the walls that keep me stuck in the friend zone.

He's just… he's something. Every other boy I've liked has liked me back, and has been so smooth and calm and collected. Austin's so blushy and bumbling and has liked everyone but me.

Okay, I need to tell him soon. I just… I can't shake this hopeful feeling that he'll love me back. That he'll forget about how he met all of them and all that'll be in his vision is me, that his eyes will follow me like I'm the brightest thing in the room. That I'll be able to convince him that he should be with me and me only. Who knows, maybe it'll happen someday…

He can never see the truth. For someone so smooth with girls, he is so blind to my feelings. I mean, even I know I'm pretty obvious. I think everyone else figured it out, besides him. I don't blame him, though. Okay, maybe I do kind of blame him. Who else do I blame, though? Myself? I couldn't do that. It's not my fault. If I could fall out of love with him, don't you think I would've and saved myself all of this heartbreak? Maybe I should be the one calling him. Maybe he shouldn't be the Heartbreak Boy; maybe I should be the Heartbreak Girl instead.

**AN: So… yeah. That was a thing.**

**Review, please! If you want, I think I could continue this, but only if you guys want me to.**

**-I Don't Want to Say Goodbye**


	2. Chapter 2

**AN: Oh my gosh, I'm so glad people liked this story! I'm updating today because I'm so happy about it!**

**We'll just consider last chapter a prologue of sorts, okay?**

**BTW, I don't own Austin and Ally or 5SOS. **

**Heartbreak Boy**

**Third Person**

"Hey, Ally!" Austin grinned.

"Oh, hi Austin." Ally managed to smile.

To anyone else, it might be easy to see that the girl was faking her smile. Strangely enough though, one of her best friends could not even see that. It's kind of strange, in the way that your friends can see through your tiniest lies and unveil your smallest secrets, yet sometimes they can't see the things that are most obvious.

"So, um… about last night…" Austin leaned forward slightly. The girl's eyes widened for a second, and she looked—nervous, maybe?

To other people, it might've looked like Austin was about to kiss Ally. Maybe it looked like Ally was about to kiss Austin. Even though Ally wished that was the case, she knew that wasn't what was going on.

"Please don't tell anyone about that." Austin finished, whispering so no one else could know. Why he whispered was beyond Ally. It was Sunday morning, and it was a slow day for the usually busy music store.

"Have I ever told?" Ally raised her eyebrows.

(It was a rhetorical question. She had never told. Not even Trish or Dez.)

"I mean, it's always hard when a breakup happens, and it's nice to have a friend there, you know?" Austin pleaded, shoving a hand through his hair.

"Yeah, I know." Ally agreed.

(Total lie. She didn't really know. She'd never had her heart broken. Well, she had kind of had her heart broken by Austin, but that was completely different. That was over unrequited love, not once-requited love.)

"I just wanted to say thanks for everything you've done for me." Austin finished. "It's nice to know that you'll help me through all of these heartbreaks."

"It's nothing, really." Ally shook her head a bit.

The blonde leaned back, smiling. Before either of the two could say anything else, his phone began to buzz.

"Crap, it's my parents. They're having a sale over at their store, and it's crazy busy, plus a couple workers called in sick today." Austin frowned, reading the text that had popped up on his phone's screen. "They want me to head over and lend a hand. I'm sorry. I'll come back over when I'm done, okay?" Austin smiled charmingly at Ally.

"Oh. Of course!" There Ally goes, faking that smile again.

"Thanks, Als. See you later!" Austin waved before jogging out of the store, leaving Ally alone with only the instruments, a lone customer, and her thoughts.

"You need any help?" She asked the customer, a man in his fourties.

"I don't need any help, especially from a teenage girl, of all people," The man sniffed snootily. "You're lucky you're even getting business from a professional musician like me."

"Oh, you're a musician?" Ally said, sounding genuine. Inwardly, she rolled her eyes. _People these days think that they're a musician if they can play a scale on the piano. _"Will you play something for me?"

"Of course. Maybe you can learn something from me." The "musician" slid onto a bench that held an electric keyboard. _(Not the real piano, _Ally noted. _I mean, what musician, when picking from a real piano and an electric keyboard, picks the electric?)_***1**

The musician began playing a melody Ally faintly recognized as some Top Forty pop song. It was a miracle Ally could recognize it from the way the customer's fingers tripped over each other, and all the awkward pauses and wrong notes.

Seeing as Ally had nothing better to do while the customer tripped his way through the pop song, Ally pulled out her songbook and began attempting some lyrics.

_I wish you could see the truth_

_See beyond all the masks,_

_No, that's pretty cliché. _Ally thought, crossing the lyrics out.

_High dive into frozen waves where the past comes back to life,_

_Fight fear for the selfish pain, it was worth it every time, _***2**

_Does that even make sense? _Ally thought, crossing the lyrics out again.

_Maybe I'll work on these lyrics another time. _Ally thought, defeated, before looking back up at the man working the piano. Good timing, as the man was just finishing and was looking at Ally expectantly.

"Wow!" Ally said, sort of meaning it. However, she meant wow as in, "wow, that was really awful," and was trying to turn it into wow as in, "wow that was truly great."

"Yes, well, I try." The man smirked, obviously thinking he was the best piano player in existence.

A few minutes later, he had purchased the electric keyboard and was exiting the store.

_Well, it wasn't easy, but at least I can tell dad we sold something today. _Ally thought before opening the songbook again.

_This is not what I intended_

_I always swore to you I'd never fall apart_

_You always thought that I was stronger_

_I may have failed_

_But I have loved you from the start. _***3**

_That isn't awful. I'll start with this. _Ally decided.

And for a while, the only sound in the store was a pencil being scratched into a songbook, the holder of the pencil furiously trying to put feelings into words that, maybe one day, could tell Austin how she felt.

***1: Sorry if that offends anyone. :P And yes, I'm stealing the annotations idea from We Don't Do Rhyming. It's a good idea, OKAY?**

***2: These are lyrics in the song "Clarity" by Zedd. **

***3: Lyrics in the Secondhand Serenade song, "Fall for You."**

**I don't think that was completely awful… Tell me your thoughts!**

**-I Don't Want to Say Goodbye**


	3. Chapter 3

**AN: Yo, yo, yo! I'm writing this chapter (Chapter 3) before I've posted Chapter 2 because I'm waiting until tonight to post chapter 2, so I don't really know what the response will be to Chapter 2 yet. I hope you guys enjoyed it! (UPDATE: Oh my gosh, sorry, my computer broke down and I had to get some software re-installed, so I lost the next three chapters I had written in advance. URGH. But they've been re-written and backed up, so updates should be fairly regular from now on!)**

**I don't own Austin and Ally or 5SOS.**

**Heartbreak Boy: Chapter 3**

**Ally's POV**

_And… done! _I thought happily, finishing the lyrics to my newest song. _I just need to work out the melody and I can put this into my new album!_

The song ended up being a slightly dark song about finally being ready to fall in love, and saying that even if everything isn't okay, then _maybe_ people can find happiness in love. Stress on the maybe.

It's just so frustrating. As far as I've seen, love only hurts. Austin's loved so many girls, and he breaks every time they don't love him back. I break a little bit too, to be honest. It hurts me when he's hurt.

It had been a mostly uneventful day in the store—that annoying "musician," an old woman looking to buy her grandson a new guitar, some families interested in buying pianos—the usual, plus a little girl who really wanted to play the piano and excitedly told me how her mom may buy her one for Christmas (even though it's only June) and asked if I would give her lessons. Admittedly, I had a nice time showing the families all the cool options for pianos, and I taught the little girl how to play some scales and told her I might give her lessons if she got a piano. Other than these interruptions, I had been writing and re-writing lyrics to a new song.

Now I was closing up the store. Just as I was flipping the sign from 'open' to 'closed', I remembered what Austin had said earlier.

"_Crap, it's my parents. They're having a sale over at their store, and it's crazy busy, plus a couple workers called in sick today." Austin frowned, reading the text that had popped up on his phone's screen. "They want me to head over and lend a hand. I'm sorry. I'll come back over when I'm done, okay?" Austin smiled charmingly at me. If only he knew what that smile did to me…_

"_Oh. Of course!" I said, faking a wobbly smile. Austin, however, didn't really notice that._

"_Thanks, Als. See you later!" Austin waved before jogging out of the store, leaving me alone with only the instruments, a lone customer, and my thoughts._

Austin hadn't been back yet. He hadn't come to talk to me about something that wasn't girls, or write music, or just goof around like we used to.

"Maybe now, all I'm good for is listening to his problems." I murmured to myself. "Maybe, since he can write his own songs, he doesn't need me anymore. Perhaps I'm not as permanent in his life as I thought I was."

And, at the time, it seemed like a very real possibility. It seemed to me that Austin was so distant that when he did appear, it was almost like a dream. And even on those rare occasions that I saw him, he'd talk to me about girls and run off with some lame excuse about helping his parents or Dez or meeting another girl.

Ugh, I wish so badly that I had the ability to hate him. But, I just… I can't. He hurts me so badly, and I just can't. You know what would be even better than hating him? Being indifferent to him. You know what they say: the opposite of love isn't hate, but indifference; for hate is still emotion towards a person, while indifference is nothing. (Do people say that? I don't know. I don't get out enough.)

I'm sorry if I'm complaining a lot. I know plenty of people have it worse than me. But, in case you didn't know, I'm not any other person. I'm me, and I'm not any other person, and I can't be any other person. Everyone has problems, and these are mine. If you don't like them, then ignore them.

I was about to lock up the shop and head back to my family's modest-sized house when I heard a shout from the other direction.

"Hey, Ally!" A familiar voice shouted. I turned to face the person, a genuine smile bursting onto my face.

"Oh, hi!" I greeted.

"How are you, Ally?" I hugged the person.

"I've been great since you saw me this morning." The person joked. "But it's still great to see you."

I agreed, saying, "It's great to see you too—"

**AN: Aaaaaaaaand we'll stop there for today. HAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHA. (I mean, it isn't that huge of a cliffhanger. Whatevsies, though.)**

**Review, please!**

**-I Don't Want to Say Goodbye**


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